Being Before Doing: The gift of presence
Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. —John 15:4-5
When I first stepped into student ministry, I didn’t have a title. I wasn’t pastor, director, just me. But what I had was a group of teenagers, a church that welcomed me in, and the free time of an emerging adult. I wasn’t tasked with programming or preaching regularly. I wasn’t writing lesson plans or organizing events. Mostly, I just spent time with teenagers. I listened. I asked questions. I laughed a lot. The early years at New Hope Community Church, Davisville Church, and Highland Park Presbyterian Church shaped my understanding of what it means to be called. As I was trying to make sense of my own walk with Jesus, these students trusted me and allowed me to walk through life with them. They taught me how to care for people: 10-year-old Emily going through radiation treatment for her brain tumor, Cade going home everyday to an empty house, Cooper developing epilepsy, Adam and Freddy fearing their parents’ divorce. Each of these taught me pastoral care by allowing me to love and support them.
My sense of vocation started long before I had anything resembling a formal ministry job. I wasn’t being “useful” in any measurable way. There were no spreadsheets, sermon archives, or performance reviews. What I was doing—though I couldn’t have named it then—was pastoring. I was simply present with students, walking with them, praying with them, paying attention to what God might be doing in their lives. And in that simplicity, I felt alive. I began to realize: this is what I am here for.
Vocation is what you are when no one is asking you to perform
Vocation is a little mysterious. Vocation begins with being and is unique to the way that God has wired you to love others and live for and into His kingdom. Jobs are something we do. Jobs come with paychecks, responsibilities, and expectations. Jobs have descriptions and can be done by any number of people. Vocation is something unique to you.
The first thing I realize as I look at how God is shaping my vocation, it began in me without clarity. There was not some passion or perfect opportunity that came before me. I simply was me and began stepping into other people’s lives. While vocation is being more than it is doing, I discovered mine in motion. I tried to be faithful to the people God dropped in front of me before I had a job description or perfect position.
Start with what’s right in front of you.
If you are searching for vocation It might start in an internship or a volunteer position. It might begin in quiet conversations over coffee, in late-night phone calls, in the laughter and chaos of a youth retreat. It might be noticing the way God is using you when you read Bible stories to your children before bed. Feeling God’s favor as you pray with hurting people. The feeling of joy that overcomes you when someone says “thank you” when you notice a need and take care of it.
John 15 holds the teaching of Jesus to his disciples. Abide in me. Jesus tells us that the fruit will come, all we must do is Abide. In a hunt for vocation and meaning I often get tied up in what I am doing and accomplishing instead of who I am becoming. I wish I could relive some of these early moments of ministry because as I abided in Jesus he was bearing the fruit through me.
At the beginning I wasn’t worried about success. I just wanted to be with people. To help them know they were loved. To help them see Jesus. And maybe that’s the most important clue to discovering your own vocation: What do you do, even when no one’s watching, that helps others feel more alive in Christ?
Ministry begins with presence
If I had to name the gift of those early years, it would be this: I learned that ministry doesn’t start with leadership. It starts with presence. I don’t need a microphone to be a pastor. I just need to be with people long enough to notice what God is already doing, and gently, faithfully, help them see it too.
Take Peace With You,
Zach
